Everyone has a unique style of communicating appreciation and connection; however, we expect everyone else to share the same style. A lot of conflict in relationships comes from not being able to translate other people’s love languages and understand that there is no single right way to be in a relationship. We can understand how to build relationship skills by understanding that there are at least five love languages that people use in varying combinations depending on the relationship.
Love languages are not limited to romantic relationships and can apply to family, friends, and mentors. The language that you speak in most frequently may not always be the language you want to hear from others. Learning about your individual needs and style helps you to be more aware of other’s needs and how you want to show up in relationships. There is no ideal language to use. Every preference has positives and negatives.
- Words of affirmation – Many people argue that there is a difference between words and actions, but for some people, words are their strength. They may be poetic or direct in using words to build up the other person. People who speak this language are known for being texters and writing notes. They are more likely to notice the little details and express appreciation for them.
- Gifts – People who are gift-givers tend to put a lot of thought into noticing what others like. For most of them, it’s not a material thing, but the ability to pay for someone’s coffee or picking out a book they might like is a way that they show they care about others. A lot of people feel guilty about being “showered with gifts,” although it can also refer to small things.
- Acts of Service – This can be a difficult one. People who like acts of service are more likely to give their all or open themselves up to doing favors for others. This could mean cooking, cleaning, gifts, or quality time. It overlaps the most with other languages, but can also result in being taken advantage of.
- Quality time — For some, quality time means planning activities or meals together, but it really just means giving someone else your undivided attention, whether you’re sitting on a couch, driving, or taking a walk. It is about being comfortable in someone’s preference, as well as exploring shared interests.
- Physical touch – This is usually what people think of when they define “love,” but it is not the only way to show love. Many people have difficulty holding boundaries, explaining their preferences, or letting go of past negative experiences with physical touch. Physical touch does not have to be sexual and can include holding hands, hugging, or even putting your hand on someone’s shoulder to let them know you are there.There is no hierarchy of physical touch. Some people are more physical than others.
Journey Home Can Help
Journey Home is a small residential treatment program for girls 16 – 21 years old. This is a program enforces a community-based treatment option for young girls. It is specifically designed for residents who have successfully completed a therapeutic treatment program but may need more help in transitioning back home. Journey Home West focuses on healthy living, education, responsibilities, and social integration as key components of the program. Young women leave this program feeling empowered, happy, and healthy. We can help your family today!
Contact us at (801) 444-0794